Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Simple Math (Again with FRESH thoughts)

(THIS IS HOW I SEE THIS SONG... So my Opinion... ;) ALSO sorry for how out of place it is.. My Mind has been working weird lately... )

At first he is just driving. But then he crashes, he goes into a consistant spin. To almost show how life can change at any moment. And in the moment he starts to go into his flashback phase. Because we often remember things from the past when in the moment of death or fear. He sees himself with his father. And he talks about how his father created him. Though his father might have been a hard ass or even just almost never there. And says that everything anyone has told him is a wrong. Or even that his own parents didn’t care to tell him it is wrong or right.

He then runs away and says how he has to come up with a creative excuse.. Though he thought his parents were crazy. And continues to explain how his father was always there. And showed him EVERY thing from hunting to whatever else. But he has always resented it. And how everything he though was right was quite the opposite. And he is saying how he is trying to be different from his father and how people tell him he can’t. (sort of say) Which can be thought of from many different things. Like when someone tells you that you're living your life wrong.

Then it goes to show how his friends have been there through everything with him. Then in the end his dad is sitting next to him and then they are in the truck signifies how the whole time his dad was always there. And it shows that love is always there we just sometimes may never see it. He (andy hull) just never saw that. Until now. And it something we all need to see. Wether it be in ourselves or in others. We all have to see in our own lives that we have that support. Whether friends or family.

Before i just loved this song for the lyrics. Because it some-what spoke to me in a deep sort of a sense. But after they released the actual video for the song it's spoke to me on a whole new field. And it's awesome how songs can do this. It can almost make it seem like you are part of it. Or that part of your life is close to that part of your heart (i guess) to where you would remember that part for the rest of your life. I guess you could say that i have grown to love this song, the band, the lyrics. And that it has helped me see some parts in my life i have thought of as a sad or even angering for the fact of what has happened.

I've grown to love my life. Regardless of what happens. This song has helped me see what some of my own faults are. My weaknesses. And even my strengths and my own goals in life. I might just be tooting my own horn. But damn does this song make me feel good..

(I'm sorry if what i've wrote is just all over the place.. my mind is just jumping from thought to thought lately... But this song has been the constant in my days...)


Tuesday, April 5, 2011


Now i like many others have had many dreams. Some scare the shit out of me, others make me laugh. But most recently i had a dream that made me wake up and just wonder about my life. It somewhat made me rethink some of my life. Some of the people i have met. And my whole 18 years of my life so far.
The Dream...
So i fell asleep like any other night. But the dream that comes to me is like no other. Now the person in this dream i have only seen in school, and this person came with me and some friends to Tuson. I have never known this person before. But this person just walked up to me in my dream and said to me, “ i will be with you..” As they just stared into my eyes, all i could do is hug the person. Now to me that fact of hearing, “I will be with you..” Made me wake up. And almost start to cry. And then i sat there in my bed thinking about my life as it is.
It is always so weird to hear someone say that to me. They would want to be with me. My whole life i’ve been used to the rejection. But this instance, this RANDOM person that i don’t really know wants to be with me. Not someone else. ME. Now i didn’t know what to do about this. I just sat there and was thinking about how long i would be alone before i met that one person for me.
Yet something else ran through my mind after hearing that. I never will be alone. It might take time, But i will NEVER be alone. And just hearing that in my head made me feel good.
The Other Side...
Now this is something i’ve been falling asleep to for years. After countless years of only having a bed big enough for me, having one that can fit two people is just a way of showing how lonely i am. I often go to sleep and look at the other side i just say to myself, “ God.. I wish someone was right there.. that’d be nice..” then fall asleep. But waking up is the worst. After a dream, just looking to that other side is almost like a hell to me.
It always makes me feel alone, and i do hate that feeling. But after that dream i sometimes almost see a girl sitting there looking at me and it makes me realize that i’m not alone. That girl i’ve been looking for will be there next to me one day. And i swear to GOD i will make sure she stays there by my side for the rest of my life. Because anyone who likes me, i will always love.. And i know i will find her one day.. Ahah.. One Day...
P.S.- Please realize this, You are never truly alone. There is always someone there for you. It will take time, But there is someone for you..